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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22661539">Tip In</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/birds89birds/pseuds/birds89birds'>birds89birds</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>OMGCP Cracktext Universe [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Check Please! (Webcomic)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Crack, Gen, i'll add more tags later when it's not 2:00 am</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 15:28:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>295</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22661539</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/birds89birds/pseuds/birds89birds</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>based off of elias pettersson’s goal in the canuck’s 2/11/20 game against the predators</p><p>he scored with his ass</p><p>you know what i had to do</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eric "Bitty" Bittle/Jack Zimmermann</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>OMGCP Cracktext Universe [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1659184</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>70</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Tip In</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>PLEASE NOTE THIS WAS WRITTEN AT 1:00 AM LESS RHAN 20 MINUTES AFTER THE END OF A HCOEY GAME THIS IS SUPER SHITTY BUT I DONTNGIVE A FLYING FUCK</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>this is based off of elias pettersson’s goal in the canuck’s 2/10/20 game against the predators</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>i was watching that game from my shitty computer in ottawa</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>when It happened</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>it was glorious</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>i cried</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>(from laughter)</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>ANYWAYS</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>poorly written crack fic time</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>HOLY SHIT JACK’S ASS</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shitty</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;HOLY SHIT</span>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;JACK</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Holster</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;WE THOUGHT YOUR ASS WAS </span>
</p><p>
  <span>DECORATIVE</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ransom</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;OR TO ATTRACT A MATE</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Eric Bittle</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;I did not consent to being reduced to </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Jack’s “mate”.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lardo</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;good mates</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Nursey</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;good mates</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shitty</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;I DONT CARE THAT YOU CANT SEE </span>
</p><p>
  <span>THIS YET</span>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;BUT YOU SHOULD KNOW I AM SO</span>
</p><p>
  <span>PROUD OF YOU</span>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;I AM SO PROUD, IN FACT</span>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;I AM GETTING DRUNK RIGHT NOW</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Holster</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;Good luck on the presser.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ransom</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;thirsty journos will be in overtime</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Chowder</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;if i ever let a puck in like that i give you</span>
</p><p>
  <span>permission to euthanize me</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Dex</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;will do</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>later bc i’m lazy</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <b>HOLY SHIT JACK’S ASS</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>&gt;I’m not entirely sure what happened.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;Why is everyone freaking out</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shitty</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;your ass</span>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;your beautiful show-stopping ass</span>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;the ass with a tumblr page</span>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;tipped a puck into the goal</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ransom</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;i almost cried when i saw it</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Holster</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;You 100% did stop lying.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lardo</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;we all did</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>&gt;So what you’re saying is I scored.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;With my ass.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Shitty</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;yep!!!!!!!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>&gt;Just my luck</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Eric Bittle</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;Press has gotta be great good</span>
</p><p>
  <span>luck sweetpea</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ransom</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;PET NAMES</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Holster</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;ON THE GROUP CHAT</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ransom</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;PHYSICAL EVIDENCE</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Holster</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;IN FRONT OF YOUR INNOCENT</span>
</p><p>
  <span>TEAMMATES</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Lardo</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>&gt;you will answer for your crimes shortly</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>&gt;I'm leaving to go to press,</span>
</p><p>
  <span>bye not sorry.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
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